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I can graduate happy now.

December 3, 2007

I have unofficially reached the pinnacle of SMC existence. I own (and am wearing) a Notre Dame male dorm t-shirt. I can now graduate a fulfilled SMC Chick (“SMC: Pronounced ‘smick.’ References a student of Saint Mary’s. We can say it, but you can’t.” -Mary Beth Ellis, author of Drink to the Lasses). Of course I’m being facetious, but there is a small element of truth and success in my Carroll Christmas shirt that nearly exceeds the Notre Dating atmosphere of this bubble we all inhabit. It’s true that I can buy all the ND apparel I desire from the bookstore and I do own my fair share of wearable spirit, but a dorm shirt is sacred. There are universes that must be aligned for this to happen.

First, you must know someone of the male persuasion at ND.
Second, you must be close enough to said someone for him to think of you during dorm t-shirt pre-orders. (Having exchanged a drunken “I think you’re hot, let’s kick it sometime” probably doesn’t count, a boyfriend-girlfriend situation is probably a key element for this to work.)
Third, you must compensate aforementioned male for his generous gift.

Aside from wearing it whenever he ventures across the street, there is a spectrum of options for this last requisite. A $5 t-shirt such as the one pictured on the right is equivalent to a cup of coffee (extra points if you use Munch Money). A long-sleeved shirt might require non-dining-hall dinner. And I wouldn’t rule out sexual favors for a sweatshirt, but I’m not condoning this behavior. But seriously… a dorm hoodie? That’s a whole new level of love. Now, this doesn’t count for the borrowed ND Engineering or ND Lacrosse hoodies. The clothing in question must be in your size and purchased with you in mind. Any girl can gank a football player’s oversized fleece from an abandoned desk in the library (I once saw Brady Quinn on the second floor, you might try there first). True success is a gift. And I’ve achieved it.

I will wear my Carroll Christmas shirt proudly and pretentiously as a constant reminder of the men of Carroll Hall.

Oh, and if the boy in question lives off campus, dump him. Or insist he buy you something from Tiffany’s… preferably that canary diamond choker that costs more than your four years of private college education. It’s a fair trade. If he lives off campus, you’re probably cooking his dinners anyways.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. ~Angela~ permalink
    December 3, 2007 6:48 am

    I never got a dorm t-shirt. But I did get an Alumni Dawgs baseball cap. From someone I wasn’t dating, which I think makes it all the more impressive.

  2. Renee permalink
    December 3, 2007 8:01 am

    A baseball cap? May I ask what the compensation was for that?

    Very impressive.

  3. ~Angela~ permalink
    December 4, 2007 2:50 am

    Consider yourself officially tagged for a meme. See my blog entry Me, Me, Me, Meme-ee for instructions.

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