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Bittersweet excitement

June 29, 2008

I’m already exhausted from this weekend and it’s only Saturday night. I drove out to the Chicago area Thursday evening to stay with a friend in a ‘burb before my “informational meeting” Friday morning in the neighboring ‘burb. My “informational meeting” was basically an interview, but I wasn’t being interviewed because no positions were available. In politics, it’s all about who you know, so if I make a contact in one office, I can be recommended to other offices. It’s how I got my most recent internship. But this time it’s for a Real Job. And it went SWIMMINGLY.

But I feel bad.

I’m a go-getter. It’s an Aries quality. I’m head strong and stubborn and I get what I want. And then I go for something else almost immediately if I don’t like it. I’ve always been this way. Sometimes I think I’d be perfect for the cut-throat lifestyles of corporate New York or politics in DC, but I also know the toll stress takes on me. What up, ulcers?

So how does this make me feel bad?

I’ve been job searching for only a couple of months. I’ve sent out 30+ resumes (I lost track after two dozen). But I knew the right people to talk to. I haven’t heard ANYTHING regarding the resumes I’ve blindly sent out. I’ve been told that resumes that aren’t from the area get thrown out immediately. I think that’s 100% true. But good networking skills and the innate good of people scored me this “informational meeting” …and I have a strong feeling that this is going to lead to a Real Job. I was practically handed a job Friday, but again, it’s difficult when there’s nothing to offer.

And I feel bad about this, why? Ah ha, I’ll tell you— The Beau Named Joe has been job searching forever. But it’s an election year. Political jobs are practically growing on trees. And we’re in a recession. Wastewater engineering jobs are being cut back for lack of city funding. Right?

But I’m a go-getter. I can’t stand not knowing what I’ll be doing a month in advance. That’s why I picked up this gig camp counseling (I move in on Thursday!), just so I had something to look forward to. Sure it was a backup, sure it’s not what I want to do for the rest of my life, and no, it’s definitely NOT ideal. It’s just a back up plan, something to make money, something to keep me afloat until I find something else. If I hate it, I don’t have to stick with it. I have the power to change my mind. Isn’t that beautiful?

Sigh. I guess it’s all an Aries thing. Capricorns have to get it totally right the first time.

And I sorta feel awful about it.

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. Princess Pointful permalink
    June 29, 2008 5:30 am

    It was great meeting you last night!!

    This desperate job search does seem to be an odd reality of the post-college world. I am watching so many friends go through such immense stress at the pressure of finding that right job, now that they’ve worked so hard at achieving the qualifications.

  2. Phil permalink
    June 29, 2008 6:53 am

    Camp counseling isn’t bad… I did it for three summers, only more as an escape from the troubles I had at home with my folks, initially. Then I found out I really liked it. Hopefully you enjoy it, too. Smile!

    The job thing will work out, I’m sure. (This coming from a Capricorn, but I’ve come to learn that the immortal words of John Lennon are true: “Life is what happens while you’re making other plans.” You just have to hang on and it’ll work out in the end.

  3. June 29, 2008 2:21 pm

    I was a camp counselor for four summers of my life, and it’s actually pretty fun depending on the ages of the children you are watching. I started writing down the crazy things they said because they made me laugh so much.

    And as far as the job thing, it will work out. You an TBNJoe will both find what you’re looking for. It might take a little bit of time, but things sometimes work a little slower. Trust me.

  4. sandy permalink
    June 29, 2008 7:07 pm

    Be happy that there was practically a job offer, that’s a great thing!
    It does suck about the not-knowing, I’m sorry. I’m similar in that I always want to find something- and it has been sucking lately because I just can’t seem to find work.

  5. Laura permalink
    June 29, 2008 7:33 pm

    Knowing that you DO have the power to change you mind is so powerful. Thats what being young and independent it all about, trying new things and figuring out what you actually enjoy.
    (or so i’m told haha)

  6. La Petite Belle permalink
    June 30, 2008 2:15 am

    I can totally identify. I feel the same way because while I’m not sure what I want to do but I am a go-getter, so I just wanna know what I want and jump on it. And when it doesn’t happen right away I get so frustrated. Oh and I’m a taurus, arent we go getters also?

    Camp counseling sounds fun, but I’d be awful at it. I’d probably get fired for counseling them home. 😉

  7. Susie permalink
    July 1, 2008 3:52 am

    Ahhh job searching has been the biggest pain in my butt the past year. Luckily I love my freelance work and don’t really neeed a job. But some days I go crazy and just want to work in an office again!

    Camp counseling will be cool…will let you earn some money and let you have a fun summer I bet!

  8. SMiChick permalink
    July 6, 2008 4:15 am

    Yeah, being a perfectionist sucks from time to time….I have this innate sense of “must stay in job because it’s what I signed up for” thing going on.

    Screw the zodiac and let’s have a drink instead.

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