Step one to less stess

Last January, I went to the hospital to test for an ulcer. It was the beginning of my final semester in college and, to make a long story short, I was stressed out to the max. I remember waking up at 3 or 4am with hellacious heartburn… and I don’t get heart burn. I ate a bottle of Tums. I cried. I gave up. And I called the doctor. I had an upper GI done, which is definitely not the most pleasant medical procedure, but it’s not the worst I’ve experienced. My stress had gotten the best of me and my body was my only outlet.

Not this time.

Last night in bed I thought about my to-do list today. My car is on the fritz so I was going to drive back to Indiana and trade cars with my dad. This means I would have to clean my car (Erin and Rachel can attest to how bad it is — Erin got a tennis ball stuck in her boot after riding in my car!) in the morning and go to the BMV, not knowing if my Illinois insurance would cover a car registered in Indiana. (Can anyone answer that?) I was going to take flowers to my mom, since it’s her birthday. But I also had to order office supplies for four separate offices, get a key made, and pick up a package at UPS. And all I really wanted to do was watch the inauguration.
All these things could NOT happen on one day. I started to get heartburn.

So instead I slept in, made arrangements to trade the car and go to the BMV on Saturday (and sweat out my fritzed car for the rest of the week). I’ll clean my car later this week. I called my mom to wish her happy birthday and explained that, even though I had 364 days to do it, I didn’t get her anything for her 50th birthday, not even a card. I wanted to send her flowers but I’m just too broke to do it. I failed as an only child.

I watched the inauguration. I ordered the office supplies. I’m picking the package up this afternoon. Joe has agreed to get the key made.

I’m doing okay. The heartburn has subsided. I will NOT have an ulcer this January.

I still have not caught up on my blogging projects. That’s what this post was going to be about initally but I got too involved giving you guys excuses.

I don’t have the time to blog and follow blogs anymore. I don’t have the patience or the time management skills. I’m slacking off in my relationship and my household duties. I’m worrying myself sick with supposed obligations. I need a change of pace.

I’ve deleted a lot of blogs from my reader. I’m sorry I can’t follow all of you. Know that I WANT to follow all of you but it’s too much right now. I’ve only kept the blogs whose authors I’ve forged meaningful relationships with. I might neglect this blog in leiu of other projects for awhile. I can’t seem to quit Twitter, so you can find me there.

This is my first step to balance. I yearn for the feeling of zen. I yearn for those days when I would walk across campus on a sunny day and realize that I’m TRULY 100% blissfully happy. Right now I’m happy, but I could be happier. I’m making progress in shedding the stress to acheive that bliss.

Soon the snow will melt from my heart.